Y is for Yonderly

Yonderly is an adjective that hasn’t been used much in the last century. It means distant. The Urban Dictionary defines it as located in the distance while the Collins Dictionary defines it as mentally or emotionally distant, gloomy or aloof. For me, feeling “yonderly” is usually the predecessor to feeling really low. I usually try to figure out what’s got me feeling disconnected and fix it before I hit the real down spell, which is hard to get out of. These are the questions I ask myself.

1. Have I been taking my medication? Has my medication been changed recently?
   If my morning routine is disrupted, I can sometimes for get my meds. That’s an easy fix. If my meds have been changed recently, then I know there is an adjustment period and the knowledge that there is end in sight usually makes me feel better.
2. Have I been taking care of my body? Exercising? Eating healthy?
   I have more energy and generally a better outlook if I’m taking care of myself. I know a couple days of poor eating or not exercising wont make much of a physical change, but when I’m not being healthy, my body image issues get magnified. I look in the mirror and see something so hideous I’m embarrassed to be seen. If I’m exercising and what not, I can handle myself. Amazing what a drastic influence being healthy has on my attitude towards myself.
3. Am I sleeping?
   I am the type of person that needs eight good hours of sleep. If this is my problem, a nap does wonders. If I’m having a bout of insomnia, I can try one of my sleep strategies.
4. Am I being a perfectionist?
   This is one of my big problems. I’ve learned how to recognize it and work with it. You can read about that here. I tend to see everything as a grand failure. I need to remind myself that I’m blowing it out of proportion and that I learn from mistakes.
5. Am I worrying about the future?
   First, is there anything I can do to feel more prepared? If so, make a list and go for it. If not, I know my worries are usually based on past experiences. I have to remember that the past does not equal the future. Just because it happened once, it’s not going to happen all the time.
6. Have I been alone a lot lately?
   This is just a trend I have noticed. If I spend a lot of time home alone, I start to spend too much time in my head and then I get depressed. This is easily fixed by going out with friends or working from a different location, like a coffee shop or my parents’ home.
7. Has anything changed recently?
   If the answer is yes, the ideal would be to reverse the change, but that’s not always possible. Changes happen, that’s life, we have to evolve along with it. Simply identifying what has changed often gives me comfort. Once I pinpoint the change, I can then figure out the best way to adapt.

So that’s my list. I never get through it without finding the cause of my change in mood. This list has been put together over years of recording my moods and behaviour. I know my triggers quite well now. I think it’s important for you to know yours. Of course overcoming the cause is a whole other battle, but you can’t fix the problem without knowing what it is in the first place.