2015AP Week 4 – Meditation

I get frustrated when I hear the word “meditation”. Usually I hear it when I am being given advice that I don’t want. I have depression. It seems to be the atypical, doesn’t-really-respond-to-medication-and-lasts-forever-kind. I am constantly told that I should meditate. It will relieve stress and negative thoughts and I’ll feel so much better. I appreciate that people are only trying to be helpful when they say this, but they always make it sound like such a simple solution. As if I hadn’t thought of this before or depression is that easy to cure. No doubt, meditation works for a lot of people. It wouldn’t be so popular if it weren’t the case. Unfortunately, it just hasn’t worked for me. It’s not for lack of trying either. I’ve tried various forms of meditation to no avail. I usually end up upset with myself because I can’t do it properly. The closest I have come to succeeding is in karate. The style I did incorporated several sort of moving meditations called katas. They were a series of punches, kicks and blocks that were preformed in succession. It cleared my head because there was no time to think. You had to move so quickly and accurately with strength behind each move. You focused on your muscles and movements, not your thoughts. That cleared my head. It wasn’t exactly relaxing though. It really got my heart pumping.

The week 4 exercise in the 2015 Art Project was a meditation which I wasn’t overly thrilled about. I’m not anti-meditation and it was only 8 minutes, so I thought I’d give it a try. To my surprise, I actually did enjoy it. Instead of providing an art journal prompt for this week, Victoria suggested we do an interpretation from the meditation. I think that’s why I enjoyed it more than I usually do. Instead of going into the meditation with the goal of clearing my mind and relaxing (which is near impossible for me), I went in with the goal of coming up with an art journal idea. That small shift in focus allowed me to focus on what was being said and the imagery to go with it. In doing that, I forgot everything else in my brain and I actually did relax. Maybe I have meditation performance anxiety, haha.

Part of the meditation was to picture an animal by a waterfall in a forest. That’s the part I decided to do as a journal page. The animal I saw was a unicorn. I’ve been on a bit of a unicorn kick lately, so that is probably why. I used “burlap” Distress Ink in the background and gesso’d over the areas for the unicorn and waterfall. The tree branches were created with a stencil using “burlap” and “tea dye” Distress Inks. The land, waterfall and rainbow were coloured with watercolour pencil crayons and activated with water. The mist at the bottom of the waterfall has some neocolor II crayon in it. The unicorn is mostly just white gesso. I outlined her with silver Sharpie paint pen and did her mane and tail with pink Sharpie paint pen. The shadows on her body are grey crayon. I outlined the unicorn in white neocolor to give the impression she was glowing.

2015-02-02 08.56.372015-02-02 08.56.44

Another part of the meditation was to lie in the water and let our worries wash away. I decided to scrawl all my current worries into the waterfall with gel pens to make the water look like it was moving. It didn’t really work, but I tried at least. The spread still feels a little unfinished, but I am out of ideas for the moment. I feel like the upper right area could use something…a quote maybe? I’ll add to it later if I come up with anything.

2015-02-12 16.22.292015-02-12 15.27.45

Join the 2015 Art Project on Facebook!

Advertisements

12 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. trentpmcd
    Feb 15, 2015 @ 19:53:24

    I like the drawing. I’ve started to learn about meditation and what you describe with meditating with your art journal in mind is closer to they type I’m looking at than the empty your mind zen type of thing.

    Reply

    • somberscribbler
      Feb 19, 2015 @ 13:42:24

      Thanks! I would love to be able to do the zen, empty your mond kind of meditation, but it never works for me. I find it really discouraging. Im going to try to continue with the art journal kind and see what happens. Good luck with your meditations! 🙂

      Reply

      • trentpmcd
        Feb 19, 2015 @ 13:54:23

        Have you heard of the Teaching Company? They do course on all sorts of topics. They have the Arts and Music, Science, History, Literature, Religion, etc. I recently picked up 2 sets – one on yoga – I went through it before my first real class, it gave a good head start. The other is meditation. I’ve just started it. It seems very interesting. It’s just something i feel I ‘m ready for at this time in my life. Not sure if I’ll continue with it once i finish the course…

      • somberscribbler
        Feb 19, 2015 @ 14:55:08

        I hadn’t heard of the teaching company. It sounds interesting though. I’ll look it up. Thanks for the tip!

      • trentpmcd
        Feb 19, 2015 @ 15:44:03

        Although they are the teaching company, on the web they go by the great courses – They are expensive, but all of their classes go on sale at least once a year. Still expensive, just not as awful! : http://www.thegreatcourses.com/

      • somberscribbler
        Feb 19, 2015 @ 16:16:15

        Definitely expensive. I am liking the tai chi course and the writing nonfiction though! Very cool. I am bookmarking this one!

  2. patchesmany
    Feb 15, 2015 @ 21:34:27

    Lovely page. I personally have had mixed results with meditation. Conventional way doesn’t seem to work much for me. The quiet makes my thoughts rush faster, the demand to quiet the mind, doesn’t work often. Although I have gotten better my meditation is simply a different form than normal. The time when my head is least filled and most calm, least thinking fast, is when I cross stitch. I wonder if perhaps you just need to find something different than the normal meditation form…..

    Reply

  3. libertasbpd
    Feb 16, 2015 @ 05:06:49

    I hate being told to meditate. It doesn’t help me either. I can’t do the breathing as it triggers me and so everything else just goes out the window and I feel like such a failure.

    Your artwork is gorgeous! I would give anything to be able to draw draw. I can believe that it would be a wonderful way to express myself and let go of some of the hideous thoughts.

    I am glad for you that you were able to make this task work and the end result is truly great. I have enjoyed admiring your skill!!
    Lib xxx

    Reply

    • somberscribbler
      Feb 16, 2015 @ 10:22:22

      Thank you for your encouraging words. Drawing and art journaling help me let go of a lot of things. I’d like to take some online drawing lessons or something one day. Most of my drawings come out cuter than they are supposed to be. I’d like to be able to depict the darkness and pain I feel some days.

      Reply

  4. NotAPunkRocker
    Feb 16, 2015 @ 09:47:10

    I like how you break down your process and the thoughts behind your images 🙂

    Reply

Talk to me!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Follow Somber Scribbler on WordPress.com

Archives

%d bloggers like this: